05.06 daPrawn's Cottage

First Love by Utada Hikaru, it keeps on reminding me every single precious moment with Wilson last time. 4 years relationship spoiled on my own hand, I ruined it myself. I shouldn't complaint anything...I shouldn't blame anyone...

I am the one who said break up. I said I do not love him anymore. Ya, I don't love him at all, it was all just because of the promises...and I was too used to him. That's it. He gave me many thing. He use everything he can to love me. Until now, many friends still asking me why would I broke up with him. I don't know how to answer them also...just...breaking up without reason, not suitable perhaps..

Everytime when I have any problem, I will remember about him. I was thinking maybe if I call him, he will come out and rescue me. I knew he will, just believed that he will. I remember that day when I broke up with Prince, I do have the feeling to call him again..but I didn't..it is too bad for me to hurt him again, I told myself. That day when I sprained my leg, I do have the feeling to call him up after Prince says he is not coming to pick me even that time I can't walk at all. "Perhaps Wilson will fly here to pick you up immediately if he knows about this", Wilson actually care me the most, Squid said. She loves to see me when I was with Wilson. I was just unordinary and always looks so bahagia. Yeah, he will help me to settle every problems. He will be there prepared to be scolded...no matter what...

I remember I throw the ring at him on our 4th Aniversary. That was the first time he never call me back after we quarrel. He lost my ring after that...but he is still wearing his ring until now.. that doesn't means anything actually, he just love wearing this kind of small accessories, he has many rings on his hand. Thats is just usual for him.

Only until that day I know he got new gf only I realise this guy will no longer there waiting for me. No one...no one will wait like this...

That day when he came my house, he ask me what plan do I have after UK. I told him about the journeys.. He said then my bf will be very pity while waiting me for very long. I told him I am single, as no one will bw willing to wait for me for so long. I knew it very well, no one could waits for so long besides him. No one will wait for me, if he stop waiting...