11 February 2013, it is the first day of snake year. As we are not going back to hometown this year, me and my mom went for shopping today, I wanted to hunt for a pair of nice boots but failed, I guess boots isn't a trend here even during winter....well, we don't have winter here~

Had some chat with Will today and understand something, we will never ever getting together, I was so naive to believe miracles could take us through. But at least I understood now and I made a nice choice, I chose my bf now, he really loves me a lot and he can take good care of me. Although I confessed to Will, but I guess we are not meant for each other, so we didn't make up. He saw my photos on fb, yeah, i did it purposely actually, although I was trying to act innocent. I believe he doesn't really have the same feeling I had on me, that is why he never said anything...but I guess he didn't know not admitting nor denying can be cruel on me, well... at least I live better now, perhaps this is the best ending for us, we both are having good life now...at least. Dear, this is not love, love is unselfish.

Has you fallen? This was the most caring, frequent quote of today due to unfavourable weather outside. It is snowing, well, maybe I call it as icy-ing. According to the weather forecast this fenomena was caused by the haze recently, the temperature of the ground is abnormally high yet caused the snow melted and when the rain reaches the ground, it changed into ice again. When the road is covered by ice, the road become slippery and it makes people to fall down easily.

According to the news today, alot of traffic accident happened today due to the wet road. Well, snowing can be bad, huh?

Has been long long time after my last post on here, hardly login due to the proxy isn't working well.

Just to update what happened during this period, I am officially in a relationship with b, this person is not up to my standard but I believe he would be someone who will treat me well. I was transfered to accounting department due to the what sort ever plan and were forced to start everything from scratch, although I always make mistake but no doubt I am trying my best to learn, to adapt and to absorb whatever I can here. Well, I believe God has a great plan on me and this is part odf His plan. God is almighty, always.

I guess I'm seeing someone like you

I guess I'm seeing someone like you, quiet and polite.
I guess I'm seeing someone like you, small but wild.
I guess I'm seeing someone like you, rude but caring.
I guess I'm seeing someone like you, cunning but gentle,
I guess I'm seeing someone like you, uncivilised but brilliant...
I have no idea how does he link to you, I have no idea whom exactly he is similar to,
but I am certain, he is like someone.
Perhaps he is just some kind of mixture of you(s).
Yeah, its true, I am seeing someone, whom so near, yet so far.

09.02 daPrawn's Castle

Dear heavenly father, sorry for being an unfaithful servant, sorry for doubting your works, but I know You are merciful, You'll always hold onto Your promises no matter what happens around me. God, please feels me with your strength when I am weak, I'm just too weak to obey and hold onto Your path. God, please make me strong enough to walk on Your path. I know God has a better plan for me, I always knew that, please makes me walk onto Your path, mold me and makes me a faithful servant. God, I am weak, but You are strong in me, your blessing be enough for me to cope with all problems I face. God, makes me live by faith and not by sight, the future is uncertain but I am so certain that God would lead me through no matter in good or bad times. Dear God, I am nothing if without You, please live in my life and be the one who take over my life. This is my prayer, in Jesus almighty's name, Amen.

08.23 daPrawn's Castle

Today is the China's Valentine's day, every girls have roses on their hands, it makes me feel kinda bad as I have nothing. Wake up Prawn, you're the one choosed to be single. Yeah, sometimes I really feel like want to simply start a relationship, but I am afraid... I'm too afraid for that... perhaps no one would understand how much I afraid.

I had a bad gastric today, after my dinner. I thought Takeshi might have medicine, so messaged him, he came to my place and saw my ill face (perhaps I really looks so ill, until yloon also came and ask me am I ok) then went away. I thought he went back to his own place and sleep, who knows later he came to my place again with medicines. This really makes me so touched. Yeah, he always makes me touched, but I know it is impossible between us. I don't want any relationship between this two years, I want something last, I hope my next bf would be my forever one.

Today W asked me am I falling for him, I replied no, he is my dream man, but not the right man, dream is sweet and nice because it is a dream, it will not be pretty anymore when it come to reality.

08.20 daPrawn's Cottage

After getting a new phone, I started to catch back with William, I told him alot of thgs about life here but he seems reluctant to say about his life...well, perhaps he doesn't feel sharing. But one thing makes me keep thinking- why he keep asking me am I falling in love?

Few days ago Takeshi keep chatting with me until 2am, we share alot about our perception on relationship, and he was so shocked to my theories and he says my theories is terrifying him. LOLZ... his new target has same theory like mine I guess and he found answer for all the unclear incident such as the girl says she love him but never want to be his gf...the theory i gave him was- perhaps it would be better to retain as friend, friends never break up but couples do. I believe this really drive him crazy~ hahahaha~